Saturday, August 30, 2003
Heart of OakCome, cheer up my lads! 'tis to glory we steer,
To add something more to this wonderful year;
'tis to honour we call you, as free men not slaves,
for who are so free as the sons of the waves?
Heart of oak are our ships
Jolly tars are our men
We always are ready;
Steady, boys, steady;
We'll fight and we'll conquer again and again!
We'll ne'er see our foes but we wish 'em to stay,
They never see us but they wish us away;
If they run, we will follow, we will drive 'em ashore,
For if they won't fight us, we cannot do more.
Heart of oak are our ships
Jolly tars are our men
We always are ready;
Steady, boys, steady;
We'll fight and we'll conquer again and again!
.:.Uniquely maladjusted... But fun.:. 11:42 PM
Thursday, August 28, 2003
AHRRGH!BOYS!
We should all throw pointy rocks at them! Big, honkin', sharp pointy rocks!
All right, so I'm pretty close to asleep - for those who don't know my habits it's somewhere around two. {Yeah, I went to bed early. No ragging.}I hear a familiar sound. Two days early.
Boy comes up in loud rattling mini-van. With radio turned WAY up. On country.
At two in the morning.
Drunk.
See? Big pointy rocks. And glass. A cannon full of silverwear too for good measure. {Mmm. Captain Sparrow...}
Anyway - I go down 'cause I don't want him waking Mom up and he starts talking about how he's back in his work, yadda, yadda. Then looks up at me three minutes after I come down and asks if I'm mad.
Riiight.
Then says the being drunk part is going to be a regularity. I don't care - so long as he keeps it up north where he's working and stays off the drugs. Then he starts talking about us getting a place together.
I'm thinking bed looks pretty damned good. By myself.
Thirty minutes later - still angry, yes. - I let him come upstairs and sleep on the couch. He passes out.
I go to bed and read until three-ish.
I figure mom wakes up and goes about her normal routine.
With out kicking him out 'cause I hear him later at eight or so in the shower. So I go out and he comes out, looking for a towel. Nekkid. Oy.
I give him a towel and wait. He comes out proclaiming his hangover.
No sympathy.
He's sobered up. I'm dressed, I go out to fill in a couple applications, stop by the school to return a few things we'd borrowed etc. Errands.
see Pirates of the Caribbean again.
Mmm. Captain Sparrow and Will Turner. Then a bunny glomps my foot and won't let go. No it's not between them. It just involves them. And an AU me and Hope've been working on.
Long story.
Anyway. Come home - Mom's here. Yay!
Boy asks how she's doing...
Turns out Mum got a big shock this morning.
Stumbles in dressed as she usually is for sleeping - i.e. NOT. - and hears a big snore from the couch. Gets a bit of a start. Goes, gets semi-dressed and goes about her morning routine.
Boy asks aout her new car. Mom doesn't answer.
Really not happy.
Boy leaves. Mom and I laugh about her 'mishap' from the morning. Day progresses normally. I think. So far.
Oy...
Big rocks.
.:.Uniquely maladjusted... But fun.:. 7:44 PM
Sunday, August 24, 2003
Whee! Saw Pulp Fiction at hte Midnite Matinee thing this morning! What a great fucking movie.So here's some quotes. Be warned - there is extensive profanity and the use of the "N-word" i.e Nigger. ^^ Just so you know!
We should have shotguns for this
- - - Vincent
The way your dad looked at it, this watch was your birthright. He'd be damned if any of the slopes were gonna get their greasy yellow hands on his boy's birthright. So he hid it in the one place he knew he could hide something: his ass. Five long years, he wore this watch up his ass. Then when he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch. I hid this uncomfortable piece of metal up my ass for two years. Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little man, I give the watch to you.
- - - Captain Koons
"Oh man, I will never forgive yo ass for this. This is some fucked-up, repugnant shit!"
"Jules, did you ever hear the philosophy that once a man admits he's wrong, then he's automatically forgiven of that wrongdoing?"
"Man, get out of my face with that shit! The motherfucker who said that never had to pick up itty bitty pieces of skull on account of your dumb ass!"
- - - Jules and Vincent
I do believe Marsellus Wallace, my husband, your boss, told you to take ME out and do WHATEVER I WANTED. I wanna dance, I wanna win. I want that trophy, so dance good
- - - Mia Wallace
Normally, both your asses would be dead as fucking fried chicken, but you happen to pull this shit while I'm in a transitional period so I don't wanna kill you, I wanna help you. But I can't give you this case, because it don't belong to me.
- - - Jules
"And you know what they call a... a... a Quarter Pounder with Cheese in Paris?"
"They don't call it a Quarter Pounder with cheese?"
"No man, they got the metric system. They wouldn't know what the fuck a Quarter Pounder is."
"Then what do they call it?"
"They call it a 'Royale' with cheese."
"A 'Royale' with cheese! What do they call a Big Mac?"
"A Big Mac's a Big Mac, but they call it 'le Big-Mac'."
"'Le Big-Mac'! Ha ha ha ha! What do they call a Whopper?"
"I dunno, I didn't go into Burger King."
- - - Wincent and Jules
What now? Well let me tell you what now. I'm gonna call a couple of pipe-hittin' niggers, who'll go to work on homes here with a pair of pliers and a blow torch. Hear me talkin' hillbilly boy? I ain't through with you by a damn sight. I'm gonna get medieval on your ass.
- - - Marsellus Wallace
"Whoa... whoa... whoa... stop right there. Eatin' a bitch out, and givin' a bitch a foot massage ain't even the same fuckin' thing."
"Not the same thing, the same ballpark."
"It ain't no ballpark either. Look maybe your method of massage differs from mine, but touchin' his lady's feet, and stickin' your tongue in her holyiest of holies, ain't the same ballpark, ain't the same league, ain't even the same fuckin' sport. Foot massages don't mean shit."
"Have you ever given a foot massage?"
"Don't be tellin' me about foot massages - I'm the foot fuckin' master."
"Given a lot of 'em?"
"Shit yeah. I got my technique down man, I don't tickle or nothin'."
"Have you ever given a guy a foot massage?"
"Fuck you."
"How many?"
"Fuck you."
"Would you give me a foot massage? I'm kinda tired."
"Man, you best back off, I'm gittin' pissed."
- - - Vincent and Jules
Oh, I'm sorry. Did I break your concentration?
- - - Jules
That's a pretty fucking good milkshake. I don't know if it's worth five dollars but it's pretty fucking good.
- - - Vincent
Just because you are a character doesn't mean that you have character.
- - - The Wolf
The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.
- - - Jules {attributed in the movie to Ezekiel 25:17}
"You're going to give her an injection of adrenaline directly to her heart."
"Then what happens?"
"I'm curious about that myself."
- - - Lance and Vincent
"Now let me ask you a question, Jules. When you drove in here, did you notice a sign out in front that said, "Dead nigger storage"?"
"Jimmie..."
"Answer the question! Did you see a sign out in front of my house that said "Dead nigger storage"?"
"Naw man, I didn't."
"You know why you didn't see that sign?"
"Why?"
"'Cause storin' dead niggers ain't my fuckin' business!"
- - - Jimme and Jules
"I can't believe this is the same car!"
"Well, let's not start sucking each other's dicks just yet."
- - - Jimmie and the Wolf
"Hand me my wallet."
"Which one is it?"
"It's the one with "bad motherfucker" written on it."
- - - Jules and "Pumpkin/Ringo"
Jules, if you give that fuckin' nimrod fifteen hundred dollars, I'm gonna shoot him on general principles.
- - - Vincent
"I've got a threshold, Jules, I've got a threshold for the abuse that I'll take and right now I'm a racecar, man, and you got me in the red. I'm just saying, I'm just SAYING it's fucking dangerous to have a racecar in the fucking red, that's all. I might blow."
"Oh, you ready to blow? Well I'm a mushroom-cloud-laying motherfucker, motherfucker! Every time my fingers touch brain I'm Superfly TNT, I'm the Guns of the Navarone. IN FACT, what the fuck am I doing in the back? You the motherfucker should be on brain detail! We fucking switching, I'm washing the windows and you picking up this nigger's skull!"
- - - Vincent and Jules
"You remember Antoine Roccamora, half black, half Samoan, used to call him Tony Rocky Horror?"
"Yeah, maybe. Fat, right?"
"I wouldn't go so far as to call the brother fat, I mean he got a weight problem. What's the nigger gonna do? He's Samoan."
- - Jules and Vincent
So what does it feel like to kill a man with your bare hands? It's a topic I'm very interested in.
- - - Esmeralda
I'm American, honey. Our names don't mean shit.
- - - Butch
Yolanda, I thought you were gonna be cool. When you yell at me, it makes me nervous. When I get nervous, I get scared. And when motherfuckers get scared, that's when motherfuckers get accidentally shot.
- - - Jules
So, pretty please - with sugar on top ... clean the fuckin' car!
- - - The Wolf
I used the same fuckin' soap you did and when I got finished, the towel didn't look like no god-damn Maxi-Pad!!
- - - Jules
Look, you brought her here, and that means that you're giving her the shot. The day that I bring an OD-ing bitch over to your house, then I'll give her the shot.
- - - Lance
.:.Uniquely maladjusted... But fun.:. 7:35 PM
An Introduction to the World
Web-Home of Parvastur Tultema, Tecilquar of the Spring-fed Field, Lover of Nature, Smiter of Idiots, Watch-Warden of the Squirrels of Inconvenience, Nazi of the Grocery, Wielder of Sword of Bronze and Emerald, Inciter of Bunnies, and Wereslut of a Thousand Forms.
Much more subtlety like that, and I'm going to have to become a used car salesman just to maintain my self-respect.
Being able to fly would be cool, but only if I could fly fast. Flying slow is floating, and that's just creepy.
Look, Lemmings -- a Cliff!
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